This just in:
Monkeyface Enterprises, in collaboration with Stay Poor LTD., is happy to announce that the new print editions of the brand new MFN, (#4) are now available for a paltry 10 dollars each--postage included. In other words, you send me ten bucks, and I send you a handsome print edition of MFN #4. Act now and you get a free, surf perch/baitfish guide thrown in (I only have about twenty of these so don't delay your order).
Add an extra five bucks and I will send you a copy of MFN #3.
Looking for a quirky semi literary X-mas gift for that grumpy semi literate fisherman in your family? Try, The Monkeyface News!
Funny thing is, I started this blog for the soul purpose of promoting the print version. And somehow forgot all about this in the last year.
I will say this however: very little of the one has bled into the other. In other words, you buy this thing and 7 of the 8 articles are new (unblogged). Plus which you can carry it with you. Impress your friends. Be the envy of your neighborhood.
Holiday B.S. got you down in the dumps?
Wishing you could ditch the in-laws and get out to the smelting grounds? Curious about the sex life of midshipmen? Wondering whatever happened to the longjaw mudsucker?
The Monkeyface News (#4) is for you!
Seriously tho. I spent over a hundred bucks printing this sucker and I'd like to make that back and do another 40. That's the plan.
In short, I will not be blogging until I have filled 20 orders. Plain and simple. Yes, I know this is blogging blackmail (blogmail?) but these are desperate times... and I am unquestionably a desperate man.
So that's it. Until I receive 20 orders for the print version of the MFN, I am not going to be blogging. (In-laws and family members don't count). No they are not made of eelskin (if you want an eel skin-bound, hard cover edition, I will custom make you one but it ain't going to come cheap).
Yes, MFN #4 is every bit as brilliant and earth shattering as the MFN blog (interpret this as you will).
To contact me for mailing address et al, just hit the "email me" button in the top right corner of this page. (My email address is: email@example.com Use Paypal if you want. But only if you have an existing Paypal account, otherwise I get charged up the wazoo... if that bums you out because you really just want to use Paypal, then please add 75 cents for a $15.00 order $1.00 for $23 dollar order... etc., sorry but it becomes pointless if I end up paying out all this extra moolah for shipping and Paypal fees)
Now That That's Settled
If you check-in here 3, 5, 8 days from now and there are no new posts, it's on you. Sorry. That's the deal.
So, breaking it down (see above for asinine Paypal fees):
15 bucks = MFN #4 (one free perch/baitfish guide per order, for the first 20 people to order)
23 bucks = MFN #3, MFN #4.
*____ bucks. Custom made eelskin-bound, collector's edition of MFN #4. (* Price to be negotiated with buyer).
20 orders and I start blogging again.
Okay that's it. I'm finished.
I have spent literally hundreds of hours on this blog, maybe thousands. Happy to do it. Happy to do it for free--the movies, the research, the writing, the uploads, the links, the witty repartee, the strange extrapolations, the haiku...
But if it ain't worth 20 orders of this magazine, I'm through. Done. Over. Finished. Capisce?
The ball is in your hands. (I wonder if NPR has ever tried this technique?)
From deep in the heart of the recession, this is Lombard Of The Intertidal saying goodbye forever (or until those 20 orders are filled--whichever comes first).